Random life of Nazifa

[Nazifa Jan]

In short, Jessica come back. We miss you.

Otherwise me, Farah & Didem will turn into this --->

Don't try escaping my interview session.

I'll keep it short because my fingers are threatening to pull off.
I am so exhausted. It's past midnight already. My eyes are strained. Everyone's dozed off. And here I am.

Good night, lovelies.

[didem]

Come back Jessica. Where are you?

[FarahN]

Goodnight Nazifa :p I should sleep too its 2 a.m
I wanna get my 'beAuty sleep' :p Tomm is my cousins engagement and I wanna look my best *sigh*
Since all my cousins young and old are married. There's lots of pressure on me. typical Pakistani style. Lol

Just like the JM heroines felt at 19 or 20 I'm made to feel like a shelved item. U know with an old manufacturing date and closer expiration date. Hahahahaha I'm cracking up at my own comment now rofl.


To Jessica- :p

[didem]

Ahahaha, don't say that.

27 is still too young for marriage. At least for me And, for JM heroines, Mer was 29 when she and Matt got back together. Don't beat yourself up. We are mcnaughtized girls. We are bound to be picky, and it's normal for us not to be satisfied with the choices we have. They suck. We want Matts and Claytons. Tell your family that!

Congratulations by the way. There is a saying in Turkish as "Allah bir yastıkta kocatsın". It's exact translation is "May Allah let you grow old on the same pillow". More appropriate translation would be "I hope their marriage would last for a lifetime" hehehe

[FarahN]

Hehe yeh I'll tell my family that. :p the problem is that Pakistan is still going through its Victorian era marriage wise lol.

Thanks for the wishes... It's a beautiful thing to say

[didem]

I know, right? We have a similar problem in some regions in Turkey. Marriage is still a taboo. Young girls are still being forced to get married to man they didn't want. And they are not allowed to break it. Luckily, my family is not like that. There is no pressure for me. They know I don't think I'll ever get married and they are okay with that. I can't get married for the sake of being married. I think even though there is some pressure for you, I don't think it's that severe. I mean you managed to not get married to just anybody yet right? (I'm assuming you want to find your own Matt, so you're waiting for him)

[FarahN]

Hahaha yeh I guess that's partly true..
My parents have been trying to get me married off since I was 15 lol
one after the other I turned down the proposals coz first I wanted to study and then I wanted to study some more. :p in Pakistan, traditionally the kids r expected to have an arranged marriage. Recently though, there have been numerous love matches. Even in my clan.

When I was young, my dad totally frowned upon the idea of a love marriage, of course I totally adored it! Lol
Somehow the men I did fall for, u know the story, were cowards n they never reached the destination.

I wasn't the only one who turned down the arranged proposals, my dad did too since he didn't like any who came calling.

Now though, after having been through a wringer emotionally.. Trying to follow my heart and all.. I'm kind of tired and wary of finding love.. I want to.. I really do.. But I don't have the strength to put myself out there emotionally and so I've sort of decided that I will settle for an arranged match that my parents would approve of. Of course I'll get to meet n approve the guy too.
The funny thing is, that my dad is desperate enuf to get me married n will now accept me bringing home a love match if its a respectable family.lol ironic. Now I can't seem to find any one..

I do have hopes of finding a matt or Clayton or even a Michael but I have more hopes of HiM finding me now...

But no way will I get married to just any one for the sake of getting married. He still has to pass at least the basic criteria list of mine and my parents :p hahahahaha

The pressure though.. It's ughhhh stifling.., coz at every one of my cousins weddings, the old biddies of the 'ton' would cluck and say... May God bless u with a match too and soon.. your time will come too...And I'm like arghhhhhh they really make me feel ancient! :p

[didem]

The old biddies! We have them here too. Whenever we attend a wedding, they are asking when am I tying the knot. They say the same thing "May God bless u with a match too and soon", and I say to them "God forbid". They become too stunned to answer that

I understand the pressure because I've seen it a lot. I hope everything turns out to be really good for you. Please don't settle for anything less than enough for you. I would say anything less than perfect but I do understand the need to not to put yourself out there. I personally don't think I will ever do that. It's too scary and also unnecessary. But if I had a crowded family like yours and they were all getting married one by one, I think I would go with your plan too. Who knows? Maybe the man your father chooses for you would be your Matt

[FarahN]

Or Clayton to be specific since he was chosen by whitney's father ahhhh now that would work out really really REALLY well lol
Thanks for the morale boost didem! U made me feel better about my dilemma

[didem]

It's great to be able to help, even for a morale boost

Yes, Clayton is the more appropriate one I should have thought of that. But whenever I think about the one I want Matt comes to my mind first. I think it's beacuse he is a contemporary hero, and it feels more possible on some level. Where and how do we find a duke in this era, ha?

[FarahN]

Hahahahaha true that.
I wonder though, if as Pakistanis we want to indulge in the Victorian marriage drama then why the hell can't We also have dukes here?? Only fair huh? :p

But yep matt it is. Ahh I agree on that one. Lets hope there are more matt(s) out there than just one. otherwise we mcnaughtized girls will be in deep trouble Lolx

[didem]

[FarahN]

Yup 4 it is!

[Nazifa Jan]

[Nazifa Jan]

Every year it's so common for us to get wedding invites. That's because we have huge families. With the females getting married between age 19 to 24. Yeah, pretty early. But, thank God, my Papa isn't like that. He is a very pro-education person. He has dreams of us doing our pHD and focusing on our studies as well as careers. So, inshAllah, there won't be any early weddings from my side.
However, the only problem is. No love marriage. Criteria: Only Afghan. Muslim. Specific tribe of Afghanistan.
For me his nationality will of course not matter. It never will. I believe I am a part of this world. No borders or land should divide us. And being a Muslim is a personal choice of mine too. BUT. Not those guys who were simply born in one Muslim family. That's not it. I like a man who thinks deeply and who'll follow their own belief. His own choice. Nothing forced. Nothing unwillingly.

So yeah, that's my only problem. If I find the one, what if he doesn't get accepted by Papa...I can NEVER defy Papa.
But I'm still young, still trying to comprehend everything. Still time. . . . .

[FarahN]

Oh yeh I had the same fears of not being able to defy my papa.. I used to worry abt whether he would like or reject my choice.. In the end though, sadly it never came to that... The guy went and married someone else. I guess he decided he didn't wanna go through my dads Spanish Inquisition. Hah! Do u see Clayton doing that? Or matt? Matt was so brave when he faced meredith's dad even though he had nothing to his name at that point in life. So u see a Mathew Farrell is what I'm looking for. A true brave man and hero

[Nazifa Jan]

I despise cowardice.
If a man is not ready to talk to my Papa and win him over for my hand, lol, I would reject him instantly. He needs to have Matt's courage to fight for me. Like a man. Or have Clayton sense of strong will. Or Zack's sense of patience for a prolonged wedding date.
Otherwise, it'll be me who'll direct him to the door. Out of my house & out of my life.

In a way, Farah, it was for the better good. At least you are single and open to have your JM hero when he arrives. [Inshallah, fingers crossed]

[FarahN]

Xoxo for the best wishes Nazifa. they help me hold hope
I wonder if Pakistan has a matt :p am I supposed to travel far n wide to find him? if yes, whereeeeee???

[FarahN]

@ Nazifa

Ditto on the cowardice bit. When I think of the past I get angry at what happened. But I get angry at myself more because I was such an idiot to have chosen that kind of a specimen. What was I thinking?!

If I could do over my life I would bypass this. I don't have many regrets. But this is one *growls*

[didem]

[FarahN]

Yeh Cinnabon (i don't think it's in turkey yet. But it's like this international dessert chain. They're famous for their yummy hot cinnamon rolls and coffee) u spelt it just fine

Yeh it's the same guy... Imagine... All sweetness and thoughtfulness wasted coz of cowardice :p
Urgh! what a waste!

[didem]

Yeah, then don't regret this. You couldn't have known. He sounds like he was very attentive, so it's natural to fall for him. Anyone coul fall for a guy that could remember a thing you said you love months ago, and gift you with that. We are only human.

[FarahN]

He was... I did...
Yeah you're right.... Only human hehe
I'll get over it.... It's just taking a little while... Actually it will be a year exactly Tomorrow.. Hmmm

[didem]

It will be a tough day for you then. Try to focus on other things, like JM books The books are the only thing that can take my mind from bad stuff. Go to JM's beautiful world when you are not working. That should work. Hopefully

[FarahN]

Yup. That's why I strategically started reading perfect so I would be totally engrossed in it and won't feel the day. and also crammed full my day with work n other stuff so I won't sit still enuf to think. At all.

[Nazifa Jan]

"JM Books to the Rescue!"

[FarahN]

Hahaha yeh always. Such is the comfort
Btw Nazifa, when exactly is your last paper? And what about u didem? When is yours?

[Nazifa Jan]

[didem]

Normally this friday, it should be over. But I may need to retake an exam because I feel like it wasn't enough. So don't know yet But tomorrow morning I have an another, a very important exam (quantum mechanics ) and I am here. I may need to retake that exam too

[FarahN]

Hahahahaha nah I'm sure you'll do well didem. best of luck!! You're almost done.
And best of luck to u too Nazifa!!
Btw I'm coming to Dxb on the 12th only. Hahahahaha will be there until the morning of 15th...
Very few days but I'm looking fwd to it

[Nazifa Jan]

While you'll be touring around in Dubai, I'll be dead asleep. That's how I ALWAYS spend my first few days of summer. Muhahaha!
Thanks, Farah!

[FarahN]

You're welcome
I think you're definitely entitled to lots of sleep since u must have been staying up at all hours to study
How long do summer vacations last in Dxb? 2 months?

[Nazifa Jan]

3 months. or about 2 in a half months.

[FarahN]

Good good lots of time to enjoyyyy

[Nazifa Jan]

Yup, I am looking forward to it.