Ahhh start of a great topic. Way to go didem!
I love what you both have written about your respective countries.
it sounds amazing!
Ok now abt my country hmm..let's see.. Pakistan itself is not a huge country but its big enough. It's bordered by china, Afghanistan, India and Iran on four sides.
yey Nazifa we're neighbours
..
Pak is divided into 4 provinces that are: Sind, Punjab, Baluchistan and North west frontier province aka NWFP. All the four regions have lots of cities in them. These 4 provinces have their own languages but Urdu is our national language and everyone understands it. There are some basic cultures and traditions that all provinces have but there are sum extreme and sum not so extreme cultures that are their own. Of course since Pakistan was divided from the subcontinent and was also under the British rule for a while, we have adopted some Indian and sum English cultures as well.
the 4 provinces also differ climate and land wise. For example Sind and Baluchistan are in south. And Punjab and NWFP are in north. Baluchistan is a desert and very very hot. Sind is half desert and half green so weather differs from city to city. Punjab has a better climate and is very green. Has mountains and 5 rivers and also experiences snowfall in some areas. NWFP has a colder drier climate. It's a moutainous area. Experiences lots of snow.
The complexions and features of people living in these 4 provinces are quite different too. Hehehe for example in Baluchistan since its so hot mostly people are dark complexioned.. They have curly dry hair.and dark eyes.. In Sind, we have all kinds of ppl. Dark, wheatish, fair and extremely fair. There are dark eyes and light coloured eyes. Different hair colours too. I personally know red heads, blondes, and brunettes
people in Sind have less tendency to be fat. And anyone who is stands out. Punjab however has a lot of overweight people. They are also tall and mostly fair of skin. There are many people with coloured eyes. Now in NWFP you might get mistaken and think u landed in America :p everyone is white WHITE and they have coloured eyes.
and different hair colours. Only since NWFP is so dry people have really early ageing skin
I live In Karachi that is in Sind and is the largest city in Pakistan. It's a huge metropolitan just like Istanbul. Although Islamabad that is in Punjab is the capital, Karachi feel more like it. It's a very happening place. It has a lot of different people living in it. U can't look at one person and know immediately where he or she is from. Like in Punjab a foreigner would stand out whereas in Karachi we take everyone in our fold.. It makes the city so colourful
so since there are different sets of people living we have a very strong cultural flavour too. And guess what? Karachi is a coastal city
so we have the big Arabian Sea!!
we have the ports too of course and that's why Karachi is the business and industrial hub of Pakistan.
Our normal dress code is this long shirt that we call a kameez and the pants are are loose and called shalwar. It's not a rule to cover your head or cover your body with those cloaks like in Saudi Arabia but some women for whatever reason choose to or again like didem said their husbands or fathers make them. I don't wear that cloak or the head dress and neither does anyone in my family
. The clothes are slightly changed now too. Many people weAr western attire in favour of the traditional one. I'm comfortable with both as long as I'm not showing too much skin. So no tiny shirts and no sleeveless. And no shorts hahha. We take this stole that's called a dupatta. We sort of drape it across our necks and chest.. The idea is to cover the chest. Many people forgo this, but I don't. I take a stole even if I wear anything western
Since its a an Islamic republic of Pakistan by law we are basically a Muslim majority state. We do have minorities living though, Christians, Hindus, Sikhs, Zoroastrians and such. And we do have their temples and prayer places, churches and all built too.
The staple food is rice and wheat. So many people include both of them In Their meal at once. Mostly though, there are lighter vegetable based foods for lunch and meat based ones for dinner. We cook our food either vegetable or meat in curry form. It's more liquidy than a normal gravy since its water based. And we call it salan we eat it with this bread made of wheat that's called roti. Roti is made just like u make the Mexican flour tortilla. U knead and roll the dough and then u flatten it by the rolling pin and slap it onto a heated flat iron pan. It rises and cooks and then you eat your Salan by dipping the bite sized pieces of roti that you break into it.
Hmmm now about marriage proposals. It's pretty Victorian lol just like I mentioned before. Mostly marriages are arranged by parents. The girl n boy do consent of course. Now though, the trend is changing and there are many love matches too. So in Arranged marriages this is how it goes: We have clans in our country.. And we have our 'ton' too. different sets of tons for different clans
there are weddings in the clan or big get togethers or parties. In those gatherings the guy's parents and especially moms and sisters are on the lookout for a girl they would like for their marriageable aged son :p some times they try to covertly show the girl they would like to propose for their son to the guy himself.
Then the boys mom would somehow find the girls moms number and call her up and say that they would like to come to their place and see the girl. If and when the girls mom consents, the boys sisters and mother would come to the girls house to see how the girl looks in her normal surroundings, how she serves them and stuff. They talk to her a bit to see a bit of her thoughts and her talking style. Lol.( I laughingly call them the X-ray team) since they really really thoroughly look the girl over ugh it's embarrassing and awkward at times. *phew*
Anyway, if and when they like the girl. They call the mom back and say our family would like to meet your family. This means the boy, his father and brothers also come for a visit. So both families meet each other. The girls family is also present. Now everybody is examining everybody hahahahaha
If the boy and his family likes the girl n her family, the boys mom calls back a few days later, few months too sometimes and says that they wanna come over to give a formal proposal. Then they come and present the girls family with all the details on the boy n their family and say that we will ask your decision in A few days time.
The girls family investigates the boys family thoroughly. They meet the family again. They meet the boy again too with And also without his family to see how he acts In Different situations. Basically I think the whole process tops the Spanish Inquisition
Lolx thank God I'm not a boy hehehe
If the girls family likes everything, they say yes to the boys mom when she calls to ask for answer. Then there is an engagement in which rings are exchanged and wedding dates are fixed.
The weddings are extravagant affairs. Of course depends on how much the girls family can afford. There is lots of yummy food and lots of flowers and people.
they are mostly segregated affairs in which men n women sit separately divided by a non see through screen. These days though, the trends are changing. Many people don't have any segregation. The raised platform or stage as we call it is always in the women's section of course. Just like Nazifa said, our brides are supposed to look decorated and pretty and sit on that stage and smile. Hehehe
they start preparing for their wedding day at least a month before. With waxings, facials, massages, skin tone lighteners and blah blah what not :p (i should mention here, that in Pakistani society everyone likes a person who is fair of skin and tall. *roll my eyes* so when the boys mom looks for girls for her son, she always tries to choose a fair skinned and tall girl. The dark ones have trouble procuring proposals through arranged systems. Sad fact. The girls who aren't fair are forever trying out fairness products and stuff. They are always made to feel less important if they're not white. i guess this comes from being ruled over by the british for more than 100 yrs. everyone wants to be fair like them) so the beauty regimens that the brides try to follow is also to look fairer if they're not already that skin tone on their big day on which she goes and gets ready from a beauty salon.( I'm thank God fair of skin and also tall. So I've never been stereotyped or made to feel less than wat I am. But I've seen my friends suffer
*sigh* )
Anyway. There is a henna ceremony a night before but since we have huge henna parlours, the ladies from those parlours are hired to come apply it to the brides hands and feet and also the closest cousins and female relations. The designs are very intricate and pretty.
the girl and her family do cry heheh there's always a crying session :p and there is music and dancing and singing. Some families look down on the dancing unless its contained within the female section. They don't like the fact that girls are dancing and all men can watch :p but there are different ways to have fun. Staying up late at nights with cousins and friends. Talking, staging theatrics, telling jokes and stuff. And ribbing the bride about her adolescence embarrassments :p heheh
The love marriages also have the same kinda wedding ceremonies but the girl tells her parents that she likes a boy. Tells them about him n his family. Sometimes the girls parents meet the boy before saying ok send your parents and sometimes the boys parents call the girls parents and come to meet and bring proposal. The girls parents can still refuse if they want to but normally, these things are decided before the boys parents propose. So all goes well. My dad was against love matches so I always used to wonder how I was gonna break the news to him that I like a guy enuf to marry him :p let's just say it never came to that :s
Hmmm I've written a saga. Maybe I should write a book on this :p hehehe ok what's left? Lemme see...
Yeh like didem said, when we meet someone we hug and kiss on both cheeks. If we are meeting someone for the first time, sometimes we just shake hands or kiss one cheek. Depends form person to person. Of course all this is reserved for meeting someone female or your first cousins hehehe. Not men. When we meet our elderly we just hug and kiss them the same way we do normally. But whenever we meet anyone at all we always say Assalam o Alaikum that's the Muslim way of greeting to which the person replies Walaikum Assalam. The first means, may God be with u and keep u safe and the second is said in reply and means you too. These are the rough translations
Many young people forgo this in favour of hi and hello or hey.. But u can never greet a person who is older than u like that or they would really think that you're disrespectful :p
Soooo my dearies.. Looks like it will take u longer to read than it took me to write :p I've been writing since yesterday in bits n pieces hahahahaha. Ask me anything that I've missed
I'll tell u more if I can remember..
Oh yeh. Normally kids live at home with their parents until they're married. Even if they're in their 20s or 30s. The girls are of course married off. And the boys bring home wives. If the house is big enuf and they're comfortable the boy n his wife live in the family home which is of course divided into sections to accommodate the growing family or some boy siblings decide to get their own place near their parents. But there are weekly get togethers. Sometimes twice too. The joint family system still exists. But more and more married people are opting to live alone rather than with in laws
I think this is it for now. :p enjoy!